So sometime on Friday-ish (my days are running together) the adrenaline rush that had been carrying me through the past week kinda wore off. Actually it just left altogether and I felt it’s absence intensely! And it hurt! 😉
I didn’t realize until that moment that I had been running on adrenaline. I was somewhat amazed that I could go through all of that stuff (see the peach picking posts) and feel as good as I did. Of course I noticed when the ibuprofen was getting toward the end of it’s helpfulness, but still, as long as I stayed up on those doses I was fine.
Now I’m just exhausted!
It shouldn’t be surprising really. The semi-sleepless nights along with the interrupted sleep nights plus the stress of the situation plus what my body actually went through are all good reasons for feeling wiped out! But now it seems ridiculous the other way! I went to the hospital this morning and was only able to stay with the girls for about 2 hours before I had to come back and take a nap! The energy was gone, just gone! that fast! Not only have I been wearing out quickly, but just about everything aches! Ugh! I feel more like I went through what I went through than I did just after it all happened. It’s not intolerable, but it adds to my lethargy. Ha!
Baby blues are kicking in a weeeeeee bit, though not too much. I was taken by surprise with those when I had Qade and it was a BAD few weeks! With Myles and Ella I was more prepared, even to the point of knowing that things were “worse” for me in the evening. I haven’t had any major meltdowns yet, and have been working SO hard to keep a positive outlook about the girls’ hospital stay and everything. Patience isn’t one of my strong virtues so I’m really making an effort not to get impatient for them to come home. It is difficult for sure. I’ve always been the one who takes care of my kids and that’s the way I like it! So to just “visit” them each day and leave them in someone else’s hands when I just want to snuggle with them is hard. But I am so thankful that I can know they are getting great care! I’ve only run into one nurse in the NICU that I don’t care for, and she has thankfully not been one of our girl’s nurses! 🙂
So… I’m taking this “de-adriniline” time as an excuse to slow down and rest as much as possible. I know now I was doing WAY too much right off the bat, and it’s catching up to me now. Because after all, when the girls DO come home I won’t have the option of just going home to get some sleep. 🙂
And a little cuteness to leave you with from my visit today: