This article about stress being a choice really resonated with me.
I read a book, several times for various reasons, while in college called “Your Reactions are Showing.” It was more like a booklet pretty short, and even though I read it from cover to cover I can’t remember much about it beyond the title. That’s enough for me though. I realize that when I react to life instead of being proactive then I’m the one out of control, and it goes downhill REALLY fast. So this little article about choosing to be stressed was just another reminder that I don’t HAVE to live in my circumstance. I can live above them. Now before you think I’m getting all “zen” or something, let me explain. Rather than let my “dander” get up the moment a young lady, who is very used to be large and in charge in her little world, walks into my house barking orders at me through her mom, I can make the CHOICE to be the “grown up” and remember that she is 4 years old and still needs to learn many things. Then I CHOOSE to go about my day helping her learn what is an appropriate way to behave in our household. 😉 Know what I mean?
The stress part really struck home with me because stress is probably one of the emotions (?? is stress an emotion??) that I’ve been opressed by a lot recently. Again, our circumstances have been favorable for stress to grow in the past few months with camp, and pregnancy, and just being in a state of limbo. However, I don’t have to feel stressed out by all of that. If I am stressed, as often happens, it’s because I’m putting undue stress ON MYSELF, or allowing other’s expectations or even what I might perceive to be their expectations put stress on me. Come on now, be honest. Haven’t you ever been visiting someone with your beloved, always well behaved children and find yourself completely stressed out and unable to enjoy the visit because you’re so concerned that your kids might do “something” that will bother the other people?? I find myself in that boat frequently and am trying to coach myself to just “chill out” like I like to tell the kids. They ARE children and they WILL act childish, and unless they are in danger or destroying something, I really need to go with the flow and learn to be a more relaxed mom. Now that’s on the inside. I don’t know if anyone else notices that I’m stressed out, but on the inside I’m totally wigged out! Most of the time this will “show” eventually in how I’m REACTING to my kids and then to my hubby, because of course, I figure he should be helping me through this stressful situation even though I haven’t mentioned a thing about it to him. 😉 Aren’t we wives bad that way??? We expect our hubs to just read our mind and then when they don’t we hold it against them as a “Well he SHOULD have known!!” Silliness!
Anyway, those are some random thoughts that have been floating around in my slightly foggy pregnancy brain recently. It’s something that I am conscious of and trying to become more so. I don’t want to be a reactive parent OR spouse. Now that I have 2 more little people who, lets face it can be stress antagonizers, in my house I need to be even more on top of my own reactions. I know with God’s help I can keep my cool and keep home working in happy harmony even when the terrible horrible no good very bad days show up. 🙂